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Search Results 0 to 8 of about 9 (some duplicates have been removed)
Comedy Central
Sep 25, 2012 12:40am PDT
that took place two weeks ago. big opportunity for one mitt romney. >> he will have his first major national platform to introduce himself and his ideas to the american people. >> jon: yes! (laughter) after only a solid, let's say, seven years on the campaign trail. (laughter) mitt romney finally had a prime time television slot to introduce himself to the voters. and ultimately ended up getting upstaged by a piece of wood. all right. (laughter) a piece of wood who spent most of his time talking to a chair. boom! (laughter) boom! (cheers and applause) no. i still love clint eastwood. i'm going on record. still love clint eastwood. all right, just three weeks after being upstage bid a chair and completely botching his response to the horrible events in libya, a new announcement from the romney campaign. >> the romney camp is said to be engineering a reboot. >> call it a romney reset. >> we begin with mitt romney who's just unveiled a new campaign strategy. >> jon: did we say we were gonna introduce him at the convention? no, no. that's not-- (laughter). you always reintroduce the candidate th
Comedy Central
Sep 26, 2012 10:45am PDT
in the exact opposite of what i told cbs' skoept" romney, which is also a terrible nickname. >> look, it doesn't make sense for us to have millions and millions of people have no health insurance and yet who can go to the emergency room and get entirely free care for which they have no responsibility. when they show up at the hospital, they get care, they get free care paid for by you and me. if that's not a form of socialism, i don't know what is. (laughter) >> jon: the uninsured being cared for in emergency rooms is irresponsible and socialist and i am totally cool that. (laughter) that's how your state wants to deal with it. you see, whatever his missteps are as a candidate barack obama is surging in the polls because the closer we get to the election it is dumber mitt romney appears to be getting. (cheers and applause) here he is touting his economic plan-- settle down. really? is that how you want to win this thing? (laughter) the other guy just tears his a.c.l., is that how you want to win? (laughter) here's romney touting his economic plan at the start of this campaign last year. >> my
Comedy Central
Sep 25, 2012 10:45am PDT
to mitt romney and mr. ryan dan senor, decrying the middle east messiness. why don't you rebut him, chief spokesman for the coalition provisional authority in iraq, a more junior dan senor >> democracy we often said when we were there that democracy is messy. if you want clean and tidy there's dictatorship but right now these iraqis political leaders are immersed in their first sort of democratic experiment >> jon: i get you, man. it was the early to mid, man. everybody was experimenting with democracy then. what's up? you know what [bleep] i'm out of here. just go at it, you two. >> just a reminder of the chaos that a lot of the policies of this administration have sowed. chaos in the arab spring. chaos for allies in israel. there are certainly areas that are problematic. we are having some tough days. we'll have tough days ahead. what we've seen in the last three days is a product of policies that have been building over the last three years. if we are successful in building some modicum democracy, it will be an enormous success. you think the president's policy in the middle east has b
Comedy Central
Sep 26, 2012 11:00pm PDT
, romney/ryan, romney/ryan. there we go, all right, that's great. thank
Comedy Central
Sep 27, 2012 10:55am PDT
is going to be here. here's moment of zen. >> quite a guy, isn't that something? wait a second, romney/ryan, romney/ryan. there we go, all right, that's great. thank you. >> oh, sweet >> stephen: tonight! can prayer change this election? well, picking paul ryan was certainly a hail mary. (laughter) then, obama's making us less safe. that terrorist from "homeland" won an emmy! (laughter) and my guest, author jim holt, has written a book on why the world exists. well, when two planets love each other very much they share a special hug. (laughter) the university of tennessee frat members were caught butt-chugging wine. (laughter) that sounds like some drunk ass (bleep). (laughter) this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause )
Comedy Central
Sep 27, 2012 7:10pm PDT
, romney/ryan, romney/ryan. there we go, all right, that's great. thank you. >> oh, sweet ♪ two... two, three... ♪ ♪ (snoring) (female giggles) bender (loud whisper): shh! don't wake up fry. (ladybot giggling) shh! my roommate's sleeping! (giggling continues) wake up already! (snorts) huh? i'm about to get down and funky with this ladybot, and i'd appreciate it if as many people as possible could know about it. now can we get some privacy?! (jackhammer rattling) (both giggling) (backup warning beeping) bender: aw, yeah! back it on up. (both giggling) (jackhammer rattling) (bluegrass music playing) ♪ hambone, hambone! ♪ hambone! okay, hambone break's over. back to the bedroom! (jackhammer rattling, pneumatic tools whirring) bender and ladybot: ♪ hambone, hambone! (groans loudly) bender: ♪ hambone! (snoring) wake up and feel the coffee! (spluttering) oh, no, i'm late for work again! (panting) sorry i'm late. well, well, well. look who decided to show up. i've had it with your tardiness, fry. i expect you to arrive the same time as everyone else. well, wait a second. leela's n
Search Results 0 to 8 of about 9 (some duplicates have been removed)